you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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