We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
