Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
