i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
