wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize