come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
honey bunches of taint.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
