wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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