know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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