Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
