you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
