youre lurking in front of me
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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