i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Sext me about skeletons
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
