so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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