Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
