You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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