it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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