it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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