Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
