I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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