Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
