Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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