Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
