there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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