yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
