I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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