you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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