We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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