i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
