Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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