well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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