Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
its not stalking. its research.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
