His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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