Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
