Do vagina's smell?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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