i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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