so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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