you guys were way drunker than both of me
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
