I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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