I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
