She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
