Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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