I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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