And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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