He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
