i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
