rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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