I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
