his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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