I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
