I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
